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I need something…

14 Nov

…and that something is a race.

And by that, I mean a road race. I’ve been reading about my friends and blog writers who are running marathons and halves and I really need a race. It has been killing me that I CAN’T run AT ALL.

I love my boys (in fact, I think one of them may have turned over today. I felt something funny on the drive to work and now I’m feeling some maybe feet kicks up under my ribs. I know to some this may seem uncomfortable, but there is nothing I wanted more than for these boys to be head down when it was time (ok I want them to be healthy and all that other mama stuff, but you catch my drift).

But…I have missed running so badly I can barely describe it. I have missed my muscles being sore. I’ve missed stretching and being sweaty (and then taking a shower after I’ve been so dirty). I miss being able to see at least a little muscle definition in my legs.

I know that this is only for a short period of time. And, in a lot of ways I’m glad for it. It’s really making me appreciate that time I had to myself…just me and the beach. I’ve even been saving my running magazines for after the boys are born. I don’t need the discouragement now, and I know I’ll need the encouragement when they’re here.

I have dreams about running soon after I give birth. And I’m talking soon. Ok, maybe not running, but maybe walking. And maybe working up my endurance (considering I can barely walk two miles now). But I have dreams of being active. My hope is that I will take them with me in the double running stroller we just picked up from my sister-in-law’s who was storing it for me. I want them to feel like that stroller is a second home, haha.

I know it’s going to take a while to get back up to speed, but just the wind blowing in my hair might just be enough. I know I shouldn’t have expectations of myself and what life is going to be like after the boys are born. My hope is that we will just stretch to fit. And that we’ll make it work, whatever the situation. We’ll see, I know.

But I can hope. And for now…I’m researching local races :).

And, of course, working on the nursery. It’s coming together! Pictures soon!

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2 Responses to “I need something…”

  1. Ashley November 14, 2011 at 11:50 pm #

    I’m pretty sure I would feel the exact same way. But having that to look forward to at the end of the 9 months is kind of exciting. You’ll get back to it and the boys will love it. 🙂

  2. bein good to me November 17, 2011 at 11:59 pm #

    I can definitely relate! Although because I’m still so early along and I can still be pretty active because I haven’t even started showing yet, the thought of running right now does not intrigue me but I can’t wait until it does again!
    You’re going to have a couple of cute running partners, that’s for sure. 🙂
    -Lisa

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